When I first met my friend Bridgette Raes 3 years ago, I told her I was a lost cause when it came to fashion- no matter that she’s a sought-after NYC style expert, with a popular blog, YouTube channel, books and TV credits -I thought I was beyond help. When I was in my formative years I once got trailed by a gang of mean teens who siren called: “AWOOOOOGAH, AWOOOOGAH – call the fashion POlice, there’s fashion CRIMES going on here!” In my 20s and 30s, when I wasn’t actually a fashion ‘Don’t’ I was a fashion ‘Didn’t’ – as in, so scared to go wrong I just threw something on and said I didn’t care, or put on an Ann Taylor Loft dress and called it a day, or dressed all in black.
It turns out though, the old saying “nothing ventured, nothing gained” which I say all the time in facing fears, applies just as well in fashion. “Style takes a certain level of confidence…of boldness…of risk taking and of not knowing what the end result will be,” Bridgette says in her recent YouTube video “Do You Have a Fear of Being Stylish?” “Expressing yourself with your clothing is no different than expressing yourself with your words.” As a writer, it’s clear how a mess of words, saddled by fear, gets in the way of communicating anything meaningfully. “If you’re not trying because you’re afraid,” Bridgette continues in the video (you must watch this video!) what is that about? “Are you afraid to be you? Are you afraid of what people think? Is it easier to blend in?” What was I hiding behind clothes that didn’t quite fit, that didn’t say anything about who I am that’s different from anyone else?
One of my all-time favorite, life-changing, pieces of Bridgette wisdom is in my book Some Nerve, and I hope you’ll take a look (it’s in the fear of public speaking chapter – which is really all about the fear of being seen and the fear of rejection). And I love her guest post “How to Beat the Wardrobe Blahs” here and our discussion on the Blogtalk Radio show “Where Are You Going in That?” that she hosted a while back. Keeping up with her on any (and all!) of her channels is a constant reminder to be proud of who I am, to take a stand in how I dress.
None of us is beyond help, in anything, but especially in fashion. You can even hire Bridgette to help you, in person or via Skype. Take a look at what she concocted for me out of my own closet:
It turns out though, the old saying “nothing ventured, nothing gained” which I say all the time in facing fears, applies just as well in fashion. “Style takes a certain level of confidence…of boldness…of risk taking and of not knowing what the end result will be,” Bridgette says in her recent YouTube video “Do You Have a Fear of Being Stylish?” “Expressing yourself with your clothing is no different than expressing yourself with your words.” As a writer, it’s clear how a mess of words, saddled by fear, gets in the way of communicating anything meaningfully. “If you’re not trying because you’re afraid,” Bridgette continues in the video (you must watch this video!) what is that about? “Are you afraid to be you? Are you afraid of what people think? Is it easier to blend in?” What was I hiding behind clothes that didn’t quite fit, that didn’t say anything about who I am that’s different from anyone else?
One of my all-time favorite, life-changing, pieces of Bridgette wisdom is in my book Some Nerve, and I hope you’ll take a look (it’s in the fear of public speaking chapter – which is really all about the fear of being seen and the fear of rejection). And I love her guest post “How to Beat the Wardrobe Blahs” here and our discussion on the Blogtalk Radio show “Where Are You Going in That?” that she hosted a while back. Keeping up with her on any (and all!) of her channels is a constant reminder to be proud of who I am, to take a stand in how I dress.
None of us is beyond help, in anything, but especially in fashion. You can even hire Bridgette to help you, in person or via Skype. Take a look at what she concocted for me out of my own closet: